How can I even start a relationship w/ no money, let alone hold together a rocky one. The economy is bad, and thats the lead cause of crime n divorce. Its hard 2 love in this environment. If the relationship is rocky/based on the kids...going broke will destroy it.
Keli
· 2 months ago
I view marriage as a covenant, and feel that many enter into it too lightly...going in thinking it's a fairy tale, that they always have an out...not understanding what marriage means...
Once he vowed forever, he is obligated to be a husband...he is also obligated to work on his marriage...
I think you forgo want you want and need once you say I do...it's now a partnership...you must respect and consider the other person before you act...
I don't think that divorce should be the first solution...but if he's not going to work on being happy...then I would rather him chunk me the deuce and pay child support...so I can get on with my life without the obligation of being his wife...although religious (old testament) law says you're still married anyway...but we're not even going to get into that...
This post reminds me of this guy I was crushing on in HS...while still in HS he ended up with this older chick...she was pretty much taking care of him so he felt obligated to marry her...he was 18 at the time...I saw him a few years later, and he was wearing his ring on the wrong finger...I asked him why? His response...because I married the wrong damn woman...
That's the problem...too many men are marrying women that are not wife material...they get caught up in the moment, and end up sacrificing their happiness. I don't know if this is because we're bringing up our boy to be "men" by doing the right thing in regards to women, without teaching them what the right thing truly is...not sure why, but it's happening way too often.
Keli
· 2 months ago
Oh my bad...I thought the bestie with the husband...
I totally misread this. But my opinion is still that as a wife she is obligated to work on her marriage...and as women, we too often end up giving our all to the wrong men...
is it because we're seeking something, and they seem to temporarily provide it, then we continue to give to them hoping that what has now turned bad would go back to good?
Marriage is serious...and kids do not a marriage make.
Princess0889
· 2 months ago
"Marriage is serious...and kids do not a marriage make."
You have said golden words to many men whom have gotten married "for the children".
ladysmood
· 2 months ago
It's hard to say because every relationship is different but I will say if there was love in the beginning it can survive, if there was no love but only obligation, the relationship sooner or later is doomed.
Princess0889
· 2 months ago
Your marriage and yourself is more important than those kids because if your relationship is not healthy then neither will the kids. I believe that it is more detrimental for those kids to see them fight than to see them separate and getting along better. I realize you have to make your kids priority but if you are not happy kids will see, hear, and feel the tension between you two.
the78msj
· 2 months ago
You know my parents are some what a different couple...they been together for a long time married like 30yrs both have professed unhappiness in the marriage, even separated for a couple weeks but at the end of the day they not going anywhere. I have even told my dad myself if he feel that unhappy he should just bounce I told my mother that as well, but they not going anywhere.
I couldn't begin to tell anyone what the right thing is concerning relationships, marriage, and children, but I do know anything worth having you have to work at it, if he felt obligated to marry this chick because he kept knocking her up why the hell he keep sticking his dick in her? How you decide after 5 kids you hate this chick? Man please I think the biggest obstacle he really facing is not having any money. Like many his mood is tied to his bank account not having enough money is making him feel like less which is greatly exaggerating everything else he going through. Men don't marry women out of obligation especially these days there had to be love there, something else besides just kids. Maybe they should seek marriage/family counseling and look into doing things together as a family unit and trying to work through this rough path. Trouble don't last always....
All Comments
Once he vowed forever, he is obligated to be a husband...he is also obligated to work on his marriage...
I think you forgo want you want and need once you say I do...it's now a partnership...you must respect and consider the other person before you act...
I don't think that divorce should be the first solution...but if he's not going to work on being happy...then I would rather him chunk me the deuce and pay child support...so I can get on with my life without the obligation of being his wife...although religious (old testament) law says you're still married anyway...but we're not even going to get into that...
This post reminds me of this guy I was crushing on in HS...while still in HS he ended up with this older chick...she was pretty much taking care of him so he felt obligated to marry her...he was 18 at the time...I saw him a few years later, and he was wearing his ring on the wrong finger...I asked him why? His response...because I married the wrong damn woman...
That's the problem...too many men are marrying women that are not wife material...they get caught up in the moment, and end up sacrificing their happiness. I don't know if this is because we're bringing up our boy to be "men" by doing the right thing in regards to women, without teaching them what the right thing truly is...not sure why, but it's happening way too often.
I totally misread this. But my opinion is still that as a wife she is obligated to work on her marriage...and as women, we too often end up giving our all to the wrong men...
is it because we're seeking something, and they seem to temporarily provide it, then we continue to give to them hoping that what has now turned bad would go back to good?
Marriage is serious...and kids do not a marriage make.
You have said golden words to many men whom have gotten married "for the children".
I believe that it is more detrimental for those kids to see them fight than to see them separate and getting along better. I realize you have to make your kids priority but if you are not happy kids will see, hear, and feel the tension between you two.
I couldn't begin to tell anyone what the right thing is concerning relationships, marriage, and children, but I do know anything worth having you have to work at it, if he felt obligated to marry this chick because he kept knocking her up why the hell he keep sticking his dick in her? How you decide after 5 kids you hate this chick? Man please I think the biggest obstacle he really facing is not having any money. Like many his mood is tied to his bank account not having enough money is making him feel like less which is greatly exaggerating everything else he going through. Men don't marry women out of obligation especially these days there had to be love there, something else besides just kids. Maybe they should seek marriage/family counseling and look into doing things together as a family unit and trying to work through this rough path. Trouble don't last always....